Mental Health Resource
Our goal is to bring people together around the issues of addictions by providing concise, up-to-date information and a meeting place for patients, their friends and families, and professionals who offer pathways to recovery. www.psyweb.com
Participate in a Research Study
If you have experienced the death of a loved one in the past ten years and are over eighteen years old, we invite you to participate in a brief online study of the ways that individuals make sense of and find meaning in loss. All participants will be entered in a raffle to win one of two $50 gift certificates to Amazon.com.
Your participation will contribute to a better understanding of grief and loss. The researchers, Dr. Brian Vandenberg, and Rachel Hibberd, are most grateful for your time and help in completing the study. If you have any questions, please e-mail rhibberd@umsl.edu. The study has been approved by the Institutional Review board of the University of Missouri-St. Louis.
Click here to participate:
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/2DTKDZ9
Book Corner
Rays of Hope in Times of Loss: Courage and Comfort for Grieving Hearts [Hardcover]
Are you, or someone you know, grieving a significant loss? Rays of Hope in Times of Loss offers soothing guidance to help you discover the answer to many questions. It is filled with powerful therapeutic narrative, original poems, and photographs that reflect the different aspects of the emotional excursion through grief. In our fast-paced lifestyles of today, many people face loss with little guidance and insufficient time to genuinely recover. This book helps people receive beauty, wisdom, and meaningful answers about loss as they move through the maze of grief, without requiring long hours of study and heavy research. Better than a sympathy card or flowers, show how much you care by giving a copy as a gift to others or to yourself.
Word Cloud
Funeral Wreaths
The Ten Best Ways to Offer Solace to Someone Who is Bereaved
Don't be shy. Talk to the bereaved, even if you are uncomfortable doing so. Remember that they are in far more discomfort than you. Call or email to say that you are thinking of them and would like to be useful.
Volunteer to drive them places. They will have immediate chores to do at a bank, a funeral home, and an attorney's office. Often they prefer company while doing these tasks but if not then you simply wait in the car.
Volunteer to bring over food. After the initial week or two, most family members will have resumed their usual schedules and are no longer available to literally cater to the bereaved. If the person says that they don't want anything then bring over soup and ice cream. Those are the best foods for a person in mourning because they contain enough calories to maintain nutrition yet require no biting and chewing. It is often difficult to bite or chew when deeply aggrieved.
Volunteer to do paper work. There are many forms that need to be filled out and the bereaved may not have the patience. You can ease the job by doing it with the person at your side responding to your questions.
Ask about the day of the death. Most people, after a few weeks, need to talk about the circumstances of the death. It helps them process it and absorb the reality. All you need to do is listen.
Help them post something on the Internet. Putting feelings into words for the world to see is a most healing endeavor.
Encourage the bereaved to create something tangible, something they can look at or carry around, that reminds them of their loved one. Suggest they make some personal jewelry from the deceased's jewelry, or perhaps choose some photos to fit into their wallet.
After several months, offer to go with them to buy a pet. If the bereaved is now alone in the house and has no reason to get up and get dressed every morning a dog is the answer.
Help expand their social network by finding course offerings at the local community college or library or house of worship. There are always activities that welcome new members. Suggest particular courses and if necessary go with them to the first class.
After many months the bereaved will need help in planning for the future. Bring over information about possible trips, vacations, cruises, etc. Having something to look forward to prevents constantly looking back.
Copyright ©2009 Roberta Temes Ph.D., author of Solace: Finding Your Way Through Grief and Learning to Live Again
About the Author: Roberta Temes, Ph.D., author of Solace: Finding Your Way Through Grief and Learning to Live Again, is a noted psychotherapist who has taught classes in death, dying, and bereavement at schools such as Downstate Medical School and CUNY. She is the author of several books, including the award-winning Living with an Empty Chair: A Guide Through Grief and The Tapping Cure. She lives in Scotch Plains, New Jersey.
| < Prev | Next > |
|---|
