Mental Health Resource
Our goal is to bring people together around the issues of addictions by providing concise, up-to-date information and a meeting place for patients, their friends and families, and professionals who offer pathways to recovery. www.psyweb.com
Participate in a Research Study
If you have experienced the death of a loved one in the past ten years and are over eighteen years old, we invite you to participate in a brief online study of the ways that individuals make sense of and find meaning in loss. All participants will be entered in a raffle to win one of two $50 gift certificates to Amazon.com.
Your participation will contribute to a better understanding of grief and loss. The researchers, Dr. Brian Vandenberg, and Rachel Hibberd, are most grateful for your time and help in completing the study. If you have any questions, please e-mail rhibberd@umsl.edu. The study has been approved by the Institutional Review board of the University of Missouri-St. Louis.
Click here to participate:
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/2DTKDZ9
Book Corner
A year after her death, Ian and his 10-year-old daughter, Mattie, are still reeling from the loss of wife and mother, Kate, who succumbed after a long, drawn-out battle with cancer. On Ian’s birthday, he opens the letter Kate gave him right before she died… Shors’ fourth novel is a moving, emotional story about coping and coming to terms with loss. Anyone who has lost a loved one will relate to this poignant novel. --Hilary Hatton
Word Cloud
Funeral Wreaths
Every 17 Minutes (Part 2): Myths and Misconceptions
When I first started my quest for information regarding suicide, I was not sure exactly what I would find. The subject of suicide stirs up fears and strong emotions within most people. These fears sometime make people shy away from learning more extensive knowledge and some of the major causes of suicide. As a result, the subject of suicide is beset by dangerous myths and misconceptions. These myths and misconceptions not only isolate people considering suicide from their families and communities, but they lead to further isolation and hopelessness—two factors highly associated with suicide attempts and completions.
In Every 17 Minutes, I wanted to bring forth the message that it is okay to talk about suicide, that it can no longer be swept under the rug. Because that is why people keep dying. People considering suicide usually know what the majority’s reaction will be, and because of this many are often reluctant to tell others how desperate and hopeless they feel.
The following information will hopefully replace the myths with facts.
| MYTH: | Only certain types kill themselves. |
| FACT: | There is no suicide “type.” Suicide is not hereditary, nor are all individuals who commit suicide mentally ill. All kinds of people end their own lives. Anyone can become suicidal. |
|
MYTH: |
A suicide attempt is a bid for attention. Ignoring it will discourage another attempt. |
| FACT: | The major cause of suicide is depression. With the depression come feelings of hopelessness and helplessness. All of the individual’s previous coping skills are not helping them deal with the situation. As a result, they feel that they have no other option but to end their life. Ignoring it will not make it go away, but increase the feeling of isolation and desperation. |
| MYTH: | Suicides happen without warning. |
| FACT: | People who contemplate suicide are torn between a desire to live and a desire to die. They nearly always give clues, hoping for help so this drastic measure won’t be necessary. It may be a frank statement or a subtle hint. |
Warning Signs of Suicide
| MYTH: | People who talk about committing suicide never do it. |
| FACT: | People who talk about suicide are reaching out for help. It is important not to ignore their cries for help. |
What To Do If Someone You Know Is Suicidal
| MYTH: | Once a person is suicidal he or she will always be suicidal. |
| FACT: | Many, many people who have attempted suicide receive help and continue to live happy, productive lives. |
| MYTH: | Never ask a deeply depressed or troubled person if he or she has suicidal thought. It might plant the idea. |
| FACT: | Talking about suicide will not plant the idea. Often it will relieve the individual and reduce the feeling of isolation. |
| MYTH: | Suicidal people always act depressed and unhappy. |
| FACT: | Suicidal people may act just like you and me, but may also exhibit one or more warning signs. The warning signs may not be obvious to everyone in the individual’s life, and you may only see one warning sign. |
What Are the Warning Signs?
A suicidal person might be suicidal if he or she:
- Has had recent severe losses
- Loses interest in hobbies, work, school
- Has trouble eating or sleeping
- Increases their use of alcohol or drugs
- Gives away prized possessions
- Prepares for death by making out a will and final arrangements
- Talks about committing suicide
- Is preoccupied with death and dying
- Experiences drastic changes in behavior
- Loses interest in their personal appearance
- Takes unnecessary risks
- Withdraws from friends and/or social activities
At this point, I want to point out that the above symptoms don’t necessarily mean someone is considering suicide; however, they are signs of a problem and need to be considered carefully.
These are a few things you can do to help someone who is threatening suicide:
- Be direct. Talk openly and matter-of-factly about suicide.
- Be willing to listen. Allow expressions of feelings. Accept the feelings.
- Don’t be judgmental. Do not debate whether suicide is right or wrong, or feelings are good or bad. Don’t lecture on the value of life.
- Get involved. Become available. Show interest and support.
- Don’t dare him or her to do it.
- Don’t act shocked. This will put distance between you.
- Don’t be sworn to secrecy. Seek support.
- Offer hope that alternatives are available but do not offer glib reassurance.
- Take action. Remove means, such as guns or any pills.
- Get help from persons or agencies specializing in crisis intervention and suicide prevention.
If you or someone you know needs to talk with someone regarding suicide, please call:
1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433) National Hotline
About the author: With a background in business administration services, Ms. Dispoto is a research, correspondence and contact liaison, with an emphasis on supporting those who need a strong (and yes, loud!) voice to implement their human rights. Learning firsthand how easy it is for one to lose everything without a moments notice—and how cruel the “system” can be when you need a helping hand—Ms. Dispoto decided to to take that disadvantage and turn it into an advantage. Having been a “closeted” writer for almost 20 years, it was time to take her life’s learning experiences in relationships, homelessness, poverty, and welfare reform (to name just a few) that she experienced, and the experiences of others who wanted help and trusted only her to be their voice, and make them public. www.authorsden.com/stephanieanne
Copyright © 2001 by Stephanie Anne Dispoto. All rights reserved.
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