Hello, Old Friend,
Oh, yes, you know
I lost my child a while ago.
No, no please
Don’t look away
And change the subject
It’s ok.
You see, at first I couldn’t feel,
It took so long, but now it’s real.
I hurt so much inside you see
I need to talk,
Come sit with me?
You see, I was numb for so very long,
And people said, “My, she is so strong.”
They did not know I couldn’t feel,
My broken heart made all unreal.
But then one day, as I awoke
I clutched my chest, began to choke,
Such a scream, such a wail,
Broke from me…
My child! My child!
The horror of reality.
But everyone has moved on, you see,
everyone except for me.
Now, when I need friends most of all,
Between us there now stands a wall.
My pain is more than they can bear,
When I mention my child,
I see their blank stare.
“But I thought you were over it,”
Their eyes seem to say,
No, no, I can’t listen to this, not today.
So I smile and pretend, and say, “Oh, I’m ok”.
But inside I am crying, as I turn away.
And so my old friend, I shall paint on a smile,
As I have from the start,
You never knowing all the while,
All I’ve just said to you in my heart.

Copyright © 2002 Kelly Cummings. All rights reserved.

Comments (12)

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written by Justine, December 07, 2007

This poem is absolutely heartbreakingly beautiful and so true with all of us who have lost a child.
Thank you for sharing this Kelly, it touched my soul
Sending love,
another bereaved mommy

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written by tonya straughn, December 07, 2007

That was beautiful. It really hit home. Thank you for sharing.

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written by crystal, January 10, 2008

thank you i have been reading alot of peoms lately im back to my old self thinking of my son i lost 16 1/2 yrs ago but i have like the peom said put on a smile and said im ok .

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written by shopgrl75, January 21, 2008

Ya know, I lost my son when he was 3 wks old (medical complications). That was over a year ago. Your poem was so beautiful... and it struck every single cord. Thank you.

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written by Cheri, February 02, 2008

How Beautiful and bitterly true,,, I lost my best friend, buddy and son .. That "one year" is fast approaching, I look into his daughter's eyes and see him... A daughter I am raising, I put that smile on for her,, Thank-you for putting into words, what we all feel,,It's comforting to know that other mom's feel it too.. God Bless...

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written by Kathie, February 11, 2008

This is beautiful and so true. Lost my 16 year old daughter to a tragic accident in Feb. 2000.
People just don't understand.

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written by Just Crying, March 02, 2008

I lost my 20 year old son November 5, 2007. I miss him so badly. You have put my feelings into words as though I've said them out loud as I sit here at 3:00 in the morning with my crying eyes and my runny nose, because I can't sleep. Thank you for your poem of wisdom.

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written by Tricia Meadow, March 15, 2008

My beautiful daughter died on 28th Jan 2008 aged 37, from bladder cancer, she died within 5 weeks of being diagnosed . She left 4 children, the youngest of them we are raising. I gave birth to her when I was only 18 and an umarried mother, which was considered shocking in 1970. One thing I can tell you with honesty, I couldn't have possibly loved her any more than I did, she was my 0nly child and my whole life.. She was not only my daughter but truly my best friend. My heart is broken and I don't know how I am going to get through the rest of my life without her.

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written by Doris, April 03, 2008

This poem has touched me deeply. I lost my son almost 6 years ago, with yet another anniversary fast approaching. You have said exactly what I have felt for some time. Thank you so very much.

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written by yvey, June 21, 2008

i am so sorry to all of you who have lost someone, i lost my niece a year ago, as you can imagine my family are devastated, my daughter was seriously ill with meningitis 5 years ago, she was very lucky, i knew then if anything should happen to her i couldnt go on, it was the worst 2 days of my life.....i do not take life for granted i know how precious it is, again i send my condolences to all of you. kind regards.

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written by Jean Puglia, July 15, 2008

Thank you Lisa for fowarding this on to me. The loss of my beautiful son May 10 2008 is so unbearable at times. It was the day before Mothers Day and I have the beautiful card he left for me to cherish. This poem discribes the depth of pain so real to all of us who have lost a child.

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written by VONNIE, August 25, 2008

What a beautiful sad poem. I lost my 18 year old daughter in 2006, I know in my heart I will grieve till I take my last breath. When I mention her name now to family and friends, thier faces change, They become afraid, not knowing what to say. They think they will say something that will make me cry. I guess they don't understand that I cry everyday.